After staying in from Monday all the way to Friday, I finally return home. It feels like i'm in combat unit instead of a clerk, I think i'm seriously overworking this week. Well, though i'm just a clerk but in my unit, we use brains instead of muscles and after work then we train muscles at the gym.
Today suppose to end early then go to the PC show or catch a movie call 'Detroit Metal City', but none happened. Dragging my feet back home after a long and boring day, when I was about to spam myself with anime episodes, a poly friend of mine pm me. Well he said that my ex status in facebook is 'In a Relationship' and ask if patched. How much worst will the day get? Long day, no movie, no PC show, reminded me of my ex again & lastly learn that she is attached. WOOTS!!
After a long chat, I lay out all my feelings and thoughts about her, good & bad, and decided that I shouldn't forever be dragged down and effected by my past. I'm not turning back already, no more special attentions for her. But the confusing part is she asked me whether wanna catch a movie (but later she cancelled) a few days after her facebook status changed. hmm.....
Well, I don't like to jump into conclusions and accused someone by mistake. I will just think that she still treat me as a friend despite having a new bf. haha... I think it will be another weird situation if we go out. I talked to another friend of mine and tell him about my ex and my decision. Strangely, his reply was he felt sorry for her as he felt that even though after the breakup I got more 'shit' but I could handle it, and even though she got lesser but she is not happy.
Haha, I dunno whether why he felt that and what is the reason, but recently I lack of the sight of a third person view. I learned that after talking to some friends a few days ago about my ex on their views of her and their first impression. Haha, when your sight is blocked, reaction and solution used will be effected. Therefore, I will just take his comments into consideration.
Anyway, tml will be a better day right! Planning to go to SIM open house then PC show and finally catch a movie with my friends. Hopeful! =)
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Woke up to a lazy morning. Manage to catch some sleep I lost over the week. I watch some programmes on TV and anime and here I am blogging at 2pm. I know it's quite early but I wanted to post something important before I forgot.
Today is my friend, nelson's, birthday. He is celebrating at DBL O today but I just found that out by another friend, who was invited, when he pm me and ask me whether I'm going or not out boredom. Well of course I rejected the last minute invitation. Haha, I'm not bitching that since they forgot and so be it, but cos of the venue. Club brings back bad memories, my ex girlfriend did not understand my feeling of insecurity when she goes clubbing. She met "better" guys there and here I am being single after a 3 year relationship, it may not be long from some people's view but to me it felt a life-time and still now I still not able to totally let it go and move on.
This reminds me of yesterday at Jurong Point. Went there to catch a movie "Push", a movie about super-natural humans, with my camp mates. I was queueing up for the tickets when I met this gal who was queueing behind me. Haha, she is no chick. She was the rock that I bump into in my relationship and I ignore the damage cos she is my ex's old friend. I regret now, as she was responsible for introducing my ex to clubbing and even intro guys from the club to my ex while bad mouth about me behind me back. Who is she?? She don't know anything about me, anything about us!
WHAT'S WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?! People who breaks relationship, thinking that their point of view is 100% accurate. People who still chasing the girl knowing that she have a boyfriend and after gotten busted, then become the good guy, tells the girl that he don't want to be the 3rd party and he blessed her for her happiness. WTF DRAMA?!(pardon me of my ill manners) But I believed that if a relationship is strong, it does not matter who tries to break it apart.
Lastly, I noticed to I'm easily forgotten, it's not only from the example I mentioned but it's ok. Maybe I'm just less easy to remember than other friends in everyone busy life.
Life is currently tough and lonely. =(
Today is my friend, nelson's, birthday. He is celebrating at DBL O today but I just found that out by another friend, who was invited, when he pm me and ask me whether I'm going or not out boredom. Well of course I rejected the last minute invitation. Haha, I'm not bitching that since they forgot and so be it, but cos of the venue. Club brings back bad memories, my ex girlfriend did not understand my feeling of insecurity when she goes clubbing. She met "better" guys there and here I am being single after a 3 year relationship, it may not be long from some people's view but to me it felt a life-time and still now I still not able to totally let it go and move on.
This reminds me of yesterday at Jurong Point. Went there to catch a movie "Push", a movie about super-natural humans, with my camp mates. I was queueing up for the tickets when I met this gal who was queueing behind me. Haha, she is no chick. She was the rock that I bump into in my relationship and I ignore the damage cos she is my ex's old friend. I regret now, as she was responsible for introducing my ex to clubbing and even intro guys from the club to my ex while bad mouth about me behind me back. Who is she?? She don't know anything about me, anything about us!
WHAT'S WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?! People who breaks relationship, thinking that their point of view is 100% accurate. People who still chasing the girl knowing that she have a boyfriend and after gotten busted, then become the good guy, tells the girl that he don't want to be the 3rd party and he blessed her for her happiness. WTF DRAMA?!(pardon me of my ill manners) But I believed that if a relationship is strong, it does not matter who tries to break it apart.
Lastly, I noticed to I'm easily forgotten, it's not only from the example I mentioned but it's ok. Maybe I'm just less easy to remember than other friends in everyone busy life.
Life is currently tough and lonely. =(
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
In a post breakup mood. Everything is so 'not' fulfilling. Everything has no colour. Must be wondering why now, after so long ago. Well, to me those times were still considered breakup mood. ha ha . . .
To be honest, I was still meeting her. I met her for movies, and I even spend valentine's day with her not long ago, bought her a gift, a little care bear. And she play with it like back then when she will play with the stuff toy to do silly 'cute' actions. But nope, we are not back together. It just as some weird friends, looks closed but yet not. We met her friend on valentine's day. She thought that we were a couple but to her disappointment we aren't. Well, every time I meet her, I have to try my hardest to draw a line. GOD!! I knew her so well that whatever I do, it's always meant for her, care for her interest.
I'm suppose to meet her again to watch Marley & Me, cause she did said she loved to read the book but never had the chance. However, today she apologised and told me that her friend(he/she, IDK) booked the tickets already. So well, I accepted her apology and ask no further qns about her date.
I have so much to brag about the missing pierce of me, it's like a deep wound that never heals. Haiz.. just want TO love someone and BE loved in return.
To be honest, I was still meeting her. I met her for movies, and I even spend valentine's day with her not long ago, bought her a gift, a little care bear. And she play with it like back then when she will play with the stuff toy to do silly 'cute' actions. But nope, we are not back together. It just as some weird friends, looks closed but yet not. We met her friend on valentine's day. She thought that we were a couple but to her disappointment we aren't. Well, every time I meet her, I have to try my hardest to draw a line. GOD!! I knew her so well that whatever I do, it's always meant for her, care for her interest.
I'm suppose to meet her again to watch Marley & Me, cause she did said she loved to read the book but never had the chance. However, today she apologised and told me that her friend(he/she, IDK) booked the tickets already. So well, I accepted her apology and ask no further qns about her date.
I have so much to brag about the missing pierce of me, it's like a deep wound that never heals. Haiz.. just want TO love someone and BE loved in return.
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